Using Technology to Teach Writing & English

            There is so much technology out there, where do you start if you are a teacher of writing?  Some believe that you should teach writing the old fashioned way and that is to have students write.  That is absolutely true, but today, you need to use the technology that’s available to help students become better writers in today’s challenging environment.

            I am a firm believer in spelling tests and having students write some compositions by hand.  I also believe in having them use pencil and paper to plan and map out papers, at least initially.  There is something in the act of physically picking up a pencil and writing on paper that reinforces lessons, spelling and good writing.  That being said, I also believe in embracing technology to enhance my lessons.

            The problem is there is so much out and so little time to explore and try out the technologies that I find myself sometimes overwhelmed by the choices and the challenge of making time to actually integrate them into my in person and online classes.

            What are some of the things that I use when I teach English and writing?

PowerPoint

            People say that PowerPoint is only meant to enhance what a speaker is saying.  And that is true if you are giving a speech, but I have found other valuable uses for PowerPoint

Teaching Grammar through Examples

            I love PowerPoint simply because I can use it for my grammar lessons so easily.  I take exercises and put them in PowerPoint and add timing so that the question or sentence appears first.  Then with the click of the mouse, I can make the answers appear once I have given students a chance to answer.  I have done all kinds of things such as circling important parts and making items disappear to leave only the correct item up.  It forces all eyes to the front of the classroom and keeps students engaged.

Testing Students’ Comprehension through Games

            Templates exist online for PowerPoint Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune, and Pyramid games.  Students have a competitive spirit, so after I create the games in PowerPoint, I break them into teams, and they go head-to-head answering questions about grammar, writing or literature. Students who are sometimes totally apathetic about my courses suddenly come alive when these games come out.  Just about everyone participates, and we have a chance to review lessons in a fun lively way.

Video and Audio Streaming

            For my literature courses, I scour the Internet and my schools’ library databases for video of the stories, plays and poets we cover in class.  When it comes to the stories, our discussions center around how each of us may have come up with a different way for portraying the story than what we have just seen.  We talk about what would need to be changed in the story because of the difference between print media and video.  When it comes to drama, seeing the plays sometimes helps students understand them better.  This is especially true with the Shakespearean plays since students often understand it better once they see the actors’ actions accompanying the words.  For poetry, audio streaming has spurred lots of discussion because I am often able to find recording by two different readers, and students see how differently they respond to a poem depending on the reader’s voice and pacing.  It is especially fun with they get to listen to the poet reading his or her own poem.

Video Capturing

            Now, I am rather shy, and I certainly don’t like being filmed, but I have discovered a use for video capturing in my online classrooms.  I am more willing to lend my voice and my desktop, and I have used video capturing to show students how to do certain thing on the computer and how to navigate my online classes.  I have from the beginning put detailed written directions for the same purpose, but when I added the video capturing to my online classes, I had fewer questions.  Offering both written directions and video directions seem to cover my student population.  The key with video capturing is to keep it short (under 5 minutes) and to rehearse and keep re-recording until you have a fairly seamless errorless video to show your students.

The Future

            Time seems to be my enemy when it comes to innovation, but there are other things I would love to do with my courses to make them come alive for the modern student.  I think we still need to have high expectation for them, but they in turn expect us to be aware of the times and to use the same tools that they do.  I will keep my eyes open and adopting technology that I think adds value to what I teach.

Difficult Students Don’t Always Misbehave

I teach mostly online these days, and while I don’t have the normal classroom disruptions that face-to-face teacher confront, I do have instances of difficult students.  This week has reminded me once again of the over-achiever/know it all student.

Don’t get me wrong: I do admire over-achievers, and once upon a time I was one of the students who always did her work, turned it in on time, and even put in the extra effort to get the best grade possible.  However, I never proceeded to criticize a teacher or admonish her for anything she did with her class.  I may have griped behind her back to my friends, but I never confronted her aggressively.  I did questions my grades and comments on my assignments, but never with criticism in my voice (that I know of).

But I am finding more and more the aggressive student – one who feels like it’s okay to call out a teacher publically or with a tone.

What got me riled this week?  This week one of my students caught me on a typo where I used the correct chapter title, but I used an incorrect chapter number.  I certainly made a mistake and it probably stemmed from updating my class from a previous edition of the textbook.  The email was okay, but she also posted that portion on the discussion board – to make it more public (although she posted that without the tone of the email). And then in the same email she proceeded to complain that other students were not turning in quality posts in the discussion board when she put every effort to craft responses that are well written and error free.

How did I handle her?  Carefully.  Seriously, I thanked her for pointing out my mistake and that I would take care of it.  What can I do?  A mistake is a mistake, and it’s better to acknowledge it.  As to her second point about the quality of work form other students, I told her the truth:  I have no control over what students turn in.  I outline the standards that I will hold them to, and I grade students according to the material they turn in.  I also said that she should continue to work hard and submit quality work.

I could have written to her that it is none of her business what other students do, but that would have just escalated the situation.  I could have also said that FERPA prevents me from discussing other students’ grade with her.  There are so many things I could have responded with and did in my own mind, but I didn’t.  I am the instructor of the course, and I am a professional.  I have to temper my responses to the situation and show the student that I am the instructor of the course and certainly in charge of it.

I have had students like her before, and I will continue to have ones like her again.  But my previous experiences have taught me how to handle the aggressive ones that feel empowered to push the boundaries – with restraint and professionalism.

A Site to Make Math Homework Easier

School has begun, and now my children are coming home and needing math homework help.  Although I excelled at math, I have to admit I’m rusty.  The other night, my daughter didn’t believer that all her addition and subtraction of mixed fractions was wrong.  They were, and I knew it, but she made me doubt myself.  Now, I’m a techie.  I teach English online.  I design Web sites.  And I consult for people who have technology problems.  I turned to the Internet, and I began arming myself with sites that would help me get through homework challenges with my kids when it comes to math.  I’ll start with the one that convinced my daughter that I was right, and she was wrong and needed to redo her homework.  She got 100% percent I might add and understood it complete.

Calculator Soup - http://www.calculatorsoup.com/

I love this site because it didn’t just give you the answers.  It showed you the steps to the answer.  Without those steps, my daughter would not have believed me.  Another good feature of this site is that input is easy.  Some math sites, you have to put the problems in such an awkward manner that you confuse a child who is already struggling.  One thing I must say, however, is that it solved the problem different than my daughter had been taught in school, but her teacher was okay with it because she showed her work and could explain the math process behind it.  My daughter used it only for the first two, and then she did the work herself and used the calculator to check her work.

This site is also good for my son’s physics class.  It doesn’t cover every sort of physics problem such as his unit dealing with gravity, but it’s a good starter.  The explanations are clear and uncluttered which really matters to him.  In a future blog, I’ll see about finding a better Physics site for high school.

What type of math does this site cover?

Algebra	Math
Chemistry	Physics
Construction	Statistics
Conversions	Geometry
Discrete Math	Plane Geometry
Finance	Solid Geometry
Fractions	Trigonometry
Games & Sports	Time
Loans	Word Problems

Many of them will not apply to you, but it’s quite comprehensive.

Also, the Math links you to all kinds of math – just about everything your child will come across during elementary, middle and high school.

Tragedy Strikes Our Neighborhood

This has been a really hard week on our neighborhood.  During the Labor Day weekend, one of the neighborhood children died.  It was a parent’s worst nightmare.  The family was enjoying a weekend at a lake when one of the children went missing.  He was found some hours later after a frantic search by family and fire rescue crews.  He had drowned.

Nathan had just begun kindergarten.  He was a charming and handsome little guy.  He was little impulsive and definitely determined to keep up with his older brother.  And his baby sister was equally determined to keep up with both of her older brothers.  They were fun to watch, and we as a community all looked out for each others’ children and enjoyed watching them grow.

Everyone is still reeling from the news, and none of us can imagine what his parents are going through.  At this time, I think they are probably still numb.  They have been fortunate to be surrounded by family and friends.  The hardest part is yet to come when the funeral is over, and they have to find some way to go on for their other two children.

Most of us don’t even have words to describe how we are feeling.  We are not the parent of this little 5 year old boy, yet his sudden death has haunted each of us deeply this week.  We haven’t spoken much with each other, but when we have, we can’t find much to say beyond that we keep thinking about Nathan and his family.  And we can’t stop thinking about him.  About them.

Yesterday, finally there were a few hours when I got so deeply involved in my work that that was all I thought about.  It gave me a little peace because I was able to let go of the sadness for just a little while.  But when I go to my driveway’s end and the bus stop and I stand next to their yard and see all the cars, the sadness just comes rushing back.  I try to block it out, but it just seeps in.

This will leave permanent scars on all of us because we all care.

I look at my children, and there is such a sense of relief that none of the close calls we had when they were little resulted in more than some scary moments and occasional scrapes.  We forget that children are just as impulsive and stubborn as adults but without the experiences and wisdom.  A tragedy can strike in the blink of an eye even with the most diligent of parents.  And one moment can mean the difference between a close call and tragedy.

I hug my children tightly and take a moment to enjoy their warmth and scent.

Katie & Justin are asking that in lieu of flowers, donations be made in Nate's name to Mechanicsville Elementary School - Playground Fund.

School Violence: What Is the Reality?

This week was the first week back to school for my children, and just one county away on the very first day, one teenager shot another in the cafeteria.  Right now, rumors are flying.  We know little about the shooter other than he’s being charged as an adult and that he is troubled with a troubled family life.  Oh yeah, we know some other troubling things because of his Facebook page.  We know little about the victim, although it seems likely he wasn’t the target, since he seems to be a gentle teen with Down syndrome.

The news shook many of us in our community, although most of us are not up in arms about it in our own children’s schools.  However, we are still concerned.  After all, it wasn’t that long ago that there was the shooting at the movie theater in Colorado on Batman’s opening night.

So what is the truth about violence in schools?

According to the CDC’s Web site on school violence, “less than 1 percent of all homicides among school-age children happen on school grounds or on the way to or from school.”  Another statistic given out by the CDC in 2007 is “during the past seven years, 116 students were killed in 109 separate incidents – an average of 16.5 student homicides per year.” 

Here are a few more facts about school violence taken directly from the CDC from a study done in 2009:

·         11.1% reported being in a physical fight on school property in the 12 months preceding the survey.

·         15.1% of male students and 6.7% of female students reported being in a physical fight on school property in the 12 months preceding the survey.

·         5.0% did not go to school on one or more days in the 30 days preceding the survey because they felt unsafe at school or on their way to or from school.

·         5.6% reported carrying a weapon (gun, knife or club) on school property on one or more days in the 30 days preceding the survey.

·         7.7% reported being threatened or injured with a weapon on school property one or more times in the 12 months preceding the survey.

            Of course, I began this blog with gun violence, and this survey covers all types of violence from shoving to more serious such as gun violence.  I was surprised to see that 7.7% said they were threatened or injured by a weapon.  There has been such a zero tolerance policy for so long in schools, I expected that number to lower.  I was also surprised at how many students admitted to carrying a weapon (5.5%).

            If you want to put these percentages into perspective, go with the estimate that we have 55.5 million students enrolled in pre-kindergarten through 12^th grade.  So of the 7.7% who were threatened or injured by a weapon in the United States translate to roughly 4,273,500 children.  Of the 5.5% who admitted to carrying a weapon that translates to 3,052,500 children.  When you take the percentages out and put it into cold hard numbers, it feels high.

            One thing that surprised me was learning that violent deaths are more likely to happen at the start or end of each semester.  It fits completely with the shooting in Perry Hall High School just a few days ago.  Still, I don’t think of the first day of school as one where violence would occur.

            Another fact by the CDC is “Nearly 50% of homicides perpetrators gave some type of warning signal, including making a threat or leaving a note, prior to the event.”  This also proved true of the shooting this week.  The teenager’s Facebook page had a comment that showed pretty clearly that the teen would do something violent that day.  Look at the CDC’s fact sheet, and you’ll see that this teen had many of the risk factors (http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pdf/SchoolViolence_FactSheet-a.pdf).

            Lately, most people have focused on bullying as the root cause for much of the violence in our schools.  At least that’s what school officials and the media lead us to believe.  But you look at the risks factors on the CDC’s sheet, and you get the sense that it’s more complex than that.  Bullying can be a catalyst, but there is so much more that goes into creating a child who could possibility commit violence at school.

             I don’t know exactly what I can do to keep my children safe.  Some of it has trusting the school system to monitor and evaluate daily behaviors of children and trusting people in my own community to do the same for children they know.  The other thing I tell my children regularly is to be aware of the children around them and how they treat them and just as importantly how they friends treat them. 

Once in a while I say to my son when he tells me about some taunting or crude behavior he witnessed his classmates doing to other boys that they should all be careful how they treat other kids because those kids will remember the meanness, and you never know if one day they’ll come to school and do something violent to those same kids.  I ask him how he would feel if he was treated that way.  I know it’s a harsh thing to tell my son, but that is the world we live in.

Fallout from My Reunion

I went to my high school reunion this past spring.  I have to say I actually enjoyed myself, and it turned out much better than expected.  Maybe it’s because our class was small.  But that’s not the topic I want to discuss.

The first thing I want to write about my disappointment at our class photograph.  When you purchase a photograph at an event knowing that it will be sent to you, what do you expect?  I expected a nice glossy of our class.  What did I get?  I got a darkish, orangey print out using an ink jet on matte finish paper.  Some of my classmates were actually orange in the photo.

What was that photographer thinking when she sent these out to all of us?  Did she think we actually expected our photographs to come that way?  And I know I am not the only one that felt that way.  I spoke to a couple of other classmates including one of the main organizers, and they too felt ripped off.

Morale of the story?  If you provide a product or service to customers, take time to make sure you understand what people expect and deliver it.  This photographer has deeply hurt her reputation because she had some 30 people buying photographs from her at $20 a pop.  She made well over $600, and she could take the time to color correct and even go to Target or WalMart and have the photographs professionally printed on glossy?  Even with that additional cost, she was have made a tidy profit.  And better yet, she would have people willing to recommend her instead of all these people who will steer clear of her in the future and even tell people not to use her.

The second thing I am still thinking about.  I met up with one woman that I always liked, and we even talked about our jobs.  She thought that maybe we could do business together in the future.  Nice. 

One day months later, she did call, but what she was offering wasn’t just a chat or potential business but a possibility of selling products under her.  It wasn’t bad that she offered that, but I guess my expectation at a reunion wasn’t to be sold too. 

I guess what colors my view is that I steer clear of products where you have to join in order to purchase, and while there are testimonials, there are no prices mentioned until you join and there are minimum monthly commitments for purchase.  She was selling those type of products.  I was disappointed and now I wonder was she really happy to see me or did she just see me as a potential customer rather than a former classmate.

Am I glad I went to the reunion?  You bet.  If this is all I have to complain about then I guess it was a very nice event.

Tools for Teachers (Part I)

With the Internet today, there has never been so many resources for teachers so easily available.  For my next few blogs, I am going to offer you some gems that I find useful as an adjunct college instructor, and I am sure you will find many of these useful too.

Templates

Vertex42.com (http://www.vertex42.com/ExcelTemplates/education.html) has some great templates to help teachers in Excel.  Choose templates for grade books, lesson plans, calendars, attendance forms, and behavior reward charts.  You can also share with your students a GPA calculator, weekly class schedule, periodic table, and graph papers.

PDF Converter

            If you are on a tight budget and there’s no money for Adobe Acrobat, you can still convert files to PDF online for free.  PDF Converter (http://www.freepdfconvert.com/) will allow you to upload your source file, and they will email the converted PDF to your.  You may convert Word, Excel, PowerPoint, images, Web pages, and other files to PDF.

Free Photo Editor

            Need to edit photos and images and there’s no money to buy PhotoShop or another photo editing software?  Avairy (http://www.aviary.com/) offers a free editor for use on the Web or your mobile device.  It may not have all the bells and whistles of a purchased software, but it certainly can do a lot and should satisfy most teachers.

            All of these options are powerful, useful and most importantly free.  Be sure to check them out and spread the word to your fellow teachers!

Classroom Activity – Creating Titles that Hook

Ever heard that you never get a second chance to make a first impression?  That’s true when you write.  Often, students overlook titles for their essays.  During the semester, I spend a class going over titles and having fun with them to show students ways to be creative and hook the reader.

One of the activities I begin with is sharing headlines I created for fairy tales and nursery rhymes.  One of the ones I use is “Rodent Terrified by Time Piece.”  At first students scratch their heads and try to think back to the nursery rhymes they remember.  Then if I’m lucky, one student will guess “Hickory Dickory Dock.”  It is a little difficult with the current generation because many of them were never read nursery rhymes, but they soon get into the activity and enjoy trying to figure out each story.  Another one I use is “Downtrodden Woman Escapes for the Evening:  Saved by Authorities.”  That’s “Cinderella.”

We talk some about the titles I offer because they are written more in the newspaper genre than for essays or stories.  We then talk about how even though they are writing academic essays, they should still try to make the title hook the reader and the introduction interesting to the reader.

Then I flip the tables on them and give them five more fairy tales and ask them to write their own titles to hook the reader.  When they are finished, I look for volunteers to share.  This is one time when students are more eager to share, and we get some good laughs from what they have written.  With this portion of the activity, I offer a site with brief summaries of the fairy tales because more and more often fewer students are familiar with all of those tales.  And even if they are familiar, it is sometimes nice to review.  I found when I developed this activity, I ended up rereading of the stories and seeing details I had forgotten or missed.

I think the most startling thing they realize from this exercise is that they should consider the audience they are writing for even if it’s just the teacher and try to make their writing interesting.

Classroom Activity - Getting Students to See the Other Side

Often history is written from the point of view of the victor.  We see everything in our lives from a certain perspective.  It colors everything, and I try to get my students to see that.  I have found one class activity that I think does this very well.

It begins with fairy tales.  I begin with having the class read The Real Story of the Three Little Pigs by A. Wolf written by Lane Smith.  Each student reads a page aloud.  I ask them to do it with feeling and a good voice.  The story garners some laughs, and it breaks up the monotony of English Composition.

And then we talk about perspective and whose points of view should a paper be written from.    We talk about the differences between what the wolf wrote and how the story was originally written.  Who does the original favor?  We also talk about in a light hearted way how everyone who goes to prison is innocent.

We then move on to the class activity.  Here I ask my students to get into groups of three or four and to write their own take on a fairy tale.  I say, “Choose a character in that fairy tale and write the story as you imagine that character would have.”  I then allow them about 15 to 20 minutes to write their version of the fairy tale.

It’s an enjoyable experience where students are given the opportunity to be creative in a English composition class.  It also requires them to review a familiar story more critically and pick up details that they may have passed over when they were children.  Often, my students give modern twists on the story, and I am often impressed with how creative they are really with their stories.

At the end, I bring them back to what I want to emphasize.  When they get to the end of the semester and have to write their argument/persuasion paper, I want them to be able to consider the other side as well as the side that they take.  I want them to step into someone else’s shoes and see if they can understand why how the other side sees the issue.

The Typical English Composition Student & Why English Composition Matters

Since January is the time when I prepare for the spring semester courses that I teach, I start to think about the classes I teach and what I would like to get from students in terms of the essays I receive.

I’m sure all of you at some time or another have had an English teacher who is absolutely in love with English and literature and what he or she teaches.  Those teachers should be.  That’s what makes an inspiring and effective teacher.  What is hard for the average student to take is when those teachers expect students to have the same love as they do.

I take a very different approach when I teach English Composition to incoming freshmen.  I know that in my class, I’ll find two maybe three students who love to write.  I’m grateful for those students because it’s likely that they’ll turn in essays that I’ll really enjoy reading. 

The majority of the students in class are students who are required to take it for the general education credits, and they will be grateful when it’s all over.  I don’t mind those students, and I tell them that I don’t expect novels and super creative works.  All that I want from them is sincere effort in trying to communicate clearly and at a college writing level.  I just want them to put in the effort that students should for any college course.

Why does English Composition matter so much?  Sometimes it’s hard to make a student understand that these highly constructed academic essays will help them with college and with life.  In a typical student’s life, there’s email and texting. Neither form of communication is anything like college English.  They don’t see the connection, and that’s what I try to show them throughout the semester.

Here are a few of the connections I hope I get my students to learn:

What’s the point of a comparison and contrast essay?  Besides learning a new form of writing, students are also learning critical comparison thinking that can help them when buying their first car, choosing an apartment, or purchasing a large appliance.  With that type of essay, students have to learn to pick out the useful information and make decisions as to what is important.  We are making comparisons all the time and basing many decisions on those comparisons.

What’s the point of an argument essay that requires research?  This one is a biggie because students groan when they know they have this huge essay at the end of the semester.  Besides helping them learn the steps in working on a longer piece of writing, I try to show how in the real world, we often have to persuade people.  If you are in sales, you have to persuade people to buy.  Why is my product better?  What special features does it offer?  Maybe you have to persuade your boss to invest in a new piece of office equipment.  Why do we need to place a perfectly good copier?  Why should we spend the money now?  We often have to persuade people both personally and professionally.  Most young students have already practiced persuasion when trying to get something out of their parents, but most of them have not learned to persuade beyond pleading and comparing themselves to their peers.  Again, I try to show them critical thinking skills.  They need to look at a problem and research it and find what’s important to that topic.  They need to learn how to blend logical argument with emotional appeal and while appearing knowledgeable about their topic.  What are the details that will sway a reader?  What are the key components that make you believe what you do?

I could offer a lot more examples, but you get the point from just these two.

We are a species that relies on communication.  We rely on verbal communication, and we rely heavily on written communication.  Our world goes beyond email and texting, and there are very few jobs out there that don’t require written communication skills.  If a student can write successfully in college English adjusting their style to whatever scenario they are given, then they can communicate effectively anywhere they go.  Writing clearly matters.

The Typical English Composition Student & Why English Composition Matters

Since January is the time when I prepare for the spring semester courses that I teach, I start to think about the classes I teach and what I would like to get from students in terms of the essays I receive.

I’m sure all of you at some time or another have had an English teacher who is absolutely in love with English and literature and what he or she teaches.  Those teachers should be.  That’s what makes an inspiring and effective teacher.  What is hard for the average student to take is when those teachers expect students to have the same love as they do.

I take a very different approach when I teach English Composition to incoming freshmen.  I know that in my class, I’ll find two maybe three students who love to write.  I’m grateful for those students because it’s likely that they’ll turn in essays that I’ll really enjoy reading. 

The majority of the students in class are students who are required to take it for the general education credits, and they will be grateful when it’s all over.  I don’t mind those students, and I tell them that I don’t expect novels and super creative works.  All that I want from them is sincere effort in trying to communicate clearly and at a college writing level.  I just want them to put in the effort that students should for any college course.

Why does English Composition matter so much?  Sometimes it’s hard to make a student understand that these highly constructed academic essays will help them with college and with life.  In a typical student’s life, there’s email and texting. Neither form of communication is anything like college English.  They don’t see the connection, and that’s what I try to show them throughout the semester.

Here are a few of the connections I hope I get my students to learn:

What’s the point of a comparison and contrast essay?  Besides learning a new form of writing, students are also learning critical comparison thinking that can help them when buying their first car, choosing an apartment, or purchasing a large appliance.  With that type of essay, students have to learn to pick out the useful information and make decisions as to what is important.  We are making comparisons all the time and basing many decisions on those comparisons.

What’s the point of an argument essay that requires research?  This one is a biggie because students groan when they know they have this huge essay at the end of the semester.  Besides helping them learn the steps in working on a longer piece of writing, I try to show how in the real world, we often have to persuade people.  If you are in sales, you have to persuade people to buy.  Why is my product better?  What special features does it offer?  Maybe you have to persuade your boss to invest in a new piece of office equipment.  Why do we need to place a perfectly good copier?  Why should we spend the money now?  We often have to persuade people both personally and professionally.  Most young students have already practiced persuasion when trying to get something out of their parents, but most of them have not learned to persuade beyond pleading and comparing themselves to their peers.  Again, I try to show them critical thinking skills.  They need to look at a problem and research it and find what’s important to that topic.  They need to learn how to blend logical argument with emotional appeal and while appearing knowledgeable about their topic.  What are the details that will sway a reader?  What are the key components that make you believe what you do?

I could offer a lot more examples, but you get the point from just these two.

We are a species that relies on communication.  We rely on verbal communication, and we rely heavily on written communication.  Our world goes beyond email and texting, and there are very few jobs out there that don’t require written communication skills.  If a student can write successfully in college English adjusting their style to whatever scenario they are given, then they can communicate effectively anywhere they go.  Writing clearly matters.

What Students Need to Add to Their Essays

If you are new to college and getting ready for English Composition (Freshman Comp), what should you try to put in your essays?  Detail.  Detail is what is lacking in many of our busy lives.  We are a society of sound bites and 30 second clips, and unfortunately, that’s what is showing up in much of the writing of recent high school graduates.

So if you are a college student, keep detail in mind when you write.  When you make a statement, you have to expand on it.  And here are some examples of how you can expand your writing both creatively and objectively.

Example 1:  In a personal essay, someone writes, “The food on my plate looked totally unappealing.”

It’s an okay sentence, and most people would have an idea what was meant.  Still, there’s the opportunity to make it more detailed so that people know why it was so unappealing to the author:  “I looked at my plate and silently gagged.  There was congealed gravy on top of some grayish matter.  I tried not to smell it, but I couldn’t help getting sour odor from the food into my nostrils.”  The author now has told you exactly what was unappealing about the food on the plate.

Example 2:  In a research paper, someone writes, “Many people will be involved in a drunk driving accident sometime in their lifetime.”

This sentence needs specific detail and support.  After all, it is part of a research paper and it’s giving a fact without detail or support.  Give the reader something to really go on and believe:  “Almost a third of the American population will be involved in a drunk driving accident sometime in their lifetime (‘Drunk Driving Facts & Stats Tips’).  That means that if you are sitting in a classroom of twenty students, at least six students in that classroom will be in an alcohol related accident some day.”  This passage now has a real statistic what is cited and a little elaboration that may make the statistic more personal.

There are many ways to expand your writing and make your essay longer and more detailed.  Remember:  don’t just fill your essay to meet the minimum length.  Figure out how to fill your essay with substance, with detail that makes the material more interesting.

The Five Senses

One thing that’s often forgotten today is to depend on the five senses.  We are such a visual society that we forget that there are other senses to draw from.  What are the five senses?

·         Sight

·         Hearing

·         Taste

·         Touch

·         Smell

Look back at the food example.  Yes, it’s very visual, but it draws on smell too.  I won’t even try to imagine what that stuff would have tasted like, but you get the picture.  Think of all the things you can include in your essay.  Talking about past birthdays?  Did your parents light the birthday candles with a match?  Recall that sulfur smell and describe it.  Been right beneath fireworks?  Describe the sounds of the explosions and how the ground rumbled under your feet.  You can also try to describe the smell of gunpowder that would have gone along with it.  Writing about your best football game in high school?  Don’t forget the feeling of being tackled with all that weight piled up on you.  Describe the mud splattering against your face during one of the wettest games ever.

Examples and Statistics

Examples can make your writing come alive, it works in giving support to your topic.  The examples can come from your own life or from newspaper and magazine articles or from any other source you can think of.  It really depends on the type of essays you are writing.  In fact, for the research paper assignments I give out, I encourage students to use examples.  Some teachers and textbooks refer to them as case studies.  Either way, find people who have been in similar circumstances and describe their situations and how it relates.  Find examples in business or science or at gatherings.  Make sure you refer to the source where the information came from when you use it.  Sometimes it can be as simple as mentioning the publication or author.  Other times, you have to be more formal and document the sources.  Again it depends on the assignment.

Use statistics to show that what you are writing about matters.  If you are writing about global warming, use examples such as the polar bears’ hunting territory shrinking.  Use statistics about how much that territory has actually shrunk.  Maybe their territory was all of the arctic and now it’s the size of …..  Again, you need to say where information came from, formally or informally depending upon the assignment.

There’s a lot more that I could write on this topic, but I think I’ve given you some ideas of how to add detail.  Like I said before, if I could give one piece of advice to new college writers, it would be to learn to write with details and avoid those 30 second sound bites.